Made of Gray


Holly D Gray7 Comments
This past week has been a rough one for me. Caleigh seems heavy this week. Heavy in weight and heavy in heart. I've always joked about her being a chunky little girl and honestly she hasn't gained her weight overnight. Oddly enough, Caleigh feels heavy to me for the first time. Maybe I'm just feeling weak and overwhelmed.
I woke up Monday morning and could barely move. My back hurt so bad. Eric was home so he tended to Caleigh. We loaded up and went to the chiropractor. My back felt tons better after going, but we already go once a week anyways. I'm thinking about starting acupuncture back up soon. Massages don't work for me because I can't relax. Alcohol? Food? What else can I do?

Caleigh had her yearly genetics appointment. We were referred to genetics early on just in case the quad whammy of Caleigh's birth was something that Eric and I passed on to her. I really like our genetics doctor. She is straight forward and down to Earth. The good news out of the appointment is that we don't have to go back to see her unless we want to. Caleigh's Gastroschisis, Prematurity, Short Bowel Syndrome and PVL brain injury were a complete snow ball of unfortunate, non-genetic events.

She brought up the idea of more children from a genetic stand point. This is a fleeting idea in our house. Depending on the time of month, alignment of the sun and the humidity levels outside...ahem. I think about more children often. As Caleigh gets older people start to ask if we will have more. What I do know is that we aren't ready...right now. The logistics of bringing another life into our already crazy schedule is too much for me to comprehend. Eric feels the same. We've also seriously talked about adoption. Every time babies are mentioned I wonder if I could even stomach being pregnant again. Pregnancy was not a fun experience for me. We're young at this point and there is plenty of time to add to our family. In His time.

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